Chad Moriyama » Comment Of The Day http://www.chadmoriyama.com Dodgers, Sabermetrics, Scouting Fri, 24 May 2013 14:54:42 +0000 en-US hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.5.1 Comment Of The Day: NotGraphs Commenter Manages To Fit 12 Cliches Into 1 Paragraph http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/09/comment-of-the-day-notgraphs-commenter-manages-to-fit-12-cliches-into-1-paragraph/ http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/09/comment-of-the-day-notgraphs-commenter-manages-to-fit-12-cliches-into-1-paragraph/#comments Wed, 05 Sep 2012 13:51:16 +0000 Chad Moriyama http://www.chadmoriyama.com/?p=9510 NotGraphs

NotGraphs posted a seemingly innocuous tongue-in-cheek type article about the Baltimore Orioles yesterday, but don’t tell that to one commenter, who managed to fit a whopping 12 cliches into a single paragraph.

Jjmann says:
September 4, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Im sick of the fantasy baseball pencil neck baseball anylists complaining about a team that steps up to challenges and does what it takes to win. Get out of your computer room and go to a game, orioles or otherwise and realize its played by human beings who can believe in what they can do, and not listen to numbers. This is old school baseball. This is what america fell in love with before steriods and computers and million dollar contracts. They may not be there next year, but they believe this year and thats why they win.

Hall Of Fame material right here.

1) Statistics means fantasy baseball.

2) Pencil-necked nerds.

3) Clutchitude.

4) They do whatever it takes to win.

5) Vague mother’s basement reference.

6) We don’t go to the games.

7) Baseball is played by humans.

8) Old school.

9) We love steroids.

10) Computers are hard.

11) Athletes today are spoiled.

12) Armchair psychologist.

Bonus!

1) “anylists”

2) “steriods”

Amazing.

I like to imagine these people as Kevin Hart in “The 40-Year-Old Virgin“.

“Well, aight, check this out, dawg. First of all, you throwin’ too many big words at me, and because I don’t understand them, I’m gonna take ‘em as disrespect. Watch your mouth and help me with the sale.“

]]> http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/09/comment-of-the-day-notgraphs-commenter-manages-to-fit-12-cliches-into-1-paragraph/feed/ 0 Comment Of The Day: #ChadBillingsleyFacts & Matt Kemp Sucks http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/comment-of-the-day-chadbillingsleyfacts-matt-kemp-sucks/ http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/comment-of-the-day-chadbillingsleyfacts-matt-kemp-sucks/#comments Wed, 18 Apr 2012 04:05:41 +0000 Chad Moriyama http://www.chadmoriyama.com/?p=5586 Chad Billingsley gave up two runs in the bottom of the second inning, which, despite the fact that he had only given up one run in his previous two starts combined, obviously meant to fans that he was a worthless mentally weak piece of shit.

I’m sure he’ll take that lesson to heart. I’m assuming this is Roy Halladay‘s Twitter account.

Not gonna bother quoting the rest of the shit, because my bandwidth is too valuable for it.

Anyway, Billingsley proceeded to throw four shutout innings after that, leading me to create #ChadBillingsleyFacts on Twitter, which I hope you all participate in with glee.

The successor to #BlameKemp.

—–

Speaking of Matt Kemp, he stuck out in the top of the eighth inning with a runner on, and Dodgers fans proved that they will blame literally anybody that doesn’t come through every single time.

I know his slugging percentage dropped below 1.000 because of that plate appearance, but geez.

]]> http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/comment-of-the-day-chadbillingsleyfacts-matt-kemp-sucks/feed/ 6 Comment Of The Day: Everybody Laugh At Stupid People Irrationally Angry At Kenley Jansen On Twitter http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/everybody-laugh-at-stupid-people-irrationally-angry-at-kenley-jansen-on-twitter/ http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/everybody-laugh-at-stupid-people-irrationally-angry-at-kenley-jansen-on-twitter/#comments Sat, 14 Apr 2012 05:44:28 +0000 Chad Moriyama http://www.chadmoriyama.com/?p=5294 If you are in this post and feel mad that I’m calling you stupid, then you can always correct that by not being stupid.

Thanks.

Come at me, bro.

Blowing one save is why he’ll never be anything in life.

Be sure to let him know.

All of this is still Jonathan Broxton‘s fault, because he blew saves once too … or something. Glad to know fans still scapegoat him for an inferior team losing to a superior team.

The funny thing? That was one of Jansen’s biggest breaking cutters of the night.

Maybe he should throw more four-seam fastballs, instead.

Jansen must fail for Javy Guerra to succeed. Sweet.

Speaking of Guerra, certain people couldn’t seem to understand where he was, exactly.

The weird part is that they didn’t seem to understand that Jansen wasn’t replacing Guerra, it’s just that the Dodgers would prefer Guerra’s arm not explode.

Besides, hasn’t Guerra lost all street credibility after that Snuggie giveaway commercial?

Anyway, I pointed out a bit of a trend…

…just saying.

I hope everybody realizes that one does not have to fail for the other to succeed. Also, don’t get too attached to a reliever, because they aren’t that valuable, regardless.

Thanks, management/logic.

]]> http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/everybody-laugh-at-stupid-people-irrationally-angry-at-kenley-jansen-on-twitter/feed/ 14 Comment Of The Day: Designate Chad Billingsley, Put Nate Eovaldi In Rotation http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/comment-of-the-day-designate-chad-billingsley-put-nate-eovaldi-in-rotation/ http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/comment-of-the-day-designate-chad-billingsley-put-nate-eovaldi-in-rotation/#comments Tue, 03 Apr 2012 06:11:29 +0000 Chad Moriyama http://www.chadmoriyama.com/?p=5029

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Concerned with Chad Billingsley‘s spring? Me too.

Cutting a potential ~4.5 WAR pitcher for a rookie in Nate Eovaldi with six strikeouts and four walks?

Sheer genius.

]]> http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/04/comment-of-the-day-designate-chad-billingsley-put-nate-eovaldi-in-rotation/feed/ 2 Comment Of The Day: The Dodgers Had A Far Better Roster Than The Diamondbacks http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/03/comment-of-the-day-the-dodgers-had-a-far-better-roster-than-the-diamondbacks/ http://www.chadmoriyama.com/2012/03/comment-of-the-day-the-dodgers-had-a-far-better-roster-than-the-diamondbacks/#comments Thu, 22 Mar 2012 19:44:38 +0000 Chad Moriyama http://www.chadmoriyama.com/?p=4854

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Decided to start this “feature” because sometimes I do unfortunately stumble into the comment sections at mainstream media sports sites and it’s truly amazing what I find there.

You can say it’s picking low hanging fruit, and it is, but I don’t give a shit because it’s hilarious to me.

Anyway, today’s gem, which you can see above, comes to us via Fox Sports in response to a Ken Rosenthal article about Don Mattingly.

Apparently Mattingly is actually an idiot, and Rosenthal is an even bigger idiot for writing about him, because the Arizona Diamondbacks were a far inferior team to the Los Angeles Dodgers, yet Kirk Gibson‘s squad won the NL West in 2011, something that was apparently all Mattingly’s fault.

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