Off Topic

MLB.TV’s idiotic policy prevents Hawaii from watching nine teams on the West Coast


I live in Hawaii. Obviously this makes it a tad difficult to either attend games or watch local broadcasts that are over 3000 miles away. Apparently though, MLB.TV cares little about that teeny tiny issue since they prevent me from watching every single Los Angeles Dodgers game live. Yes, that’s right, apparently the entire West Coast collection of MLB teams ... Read More »

Tsuyoshi Nishioka Sucks, Is Asian, Tom Powers Makes Fun Of Him With Haiku LOLOL


Tom Powers, who apparently has a history of being an idiot, decided to make recently demoted Tsuyoshi Nishioka his punching bag recently. Of course, that would be completely fine, as Nishioka’s been a terrible player for the Minnesota Twins thus far and deserves to be criticized. However, what irked me was the direction in which Powers took the criticism. Nishioka ... Read More »

Emo Dylan Hernandez Is Emo


Why does Dylan Hernandez of the Los Angeles Times look so emo in his Twitter profile picture? In fact, he’s so emo that he brought this emo mess on himself. Masochist, if you ask me. Anyway, I investigated the root cause of his emo nature, but I’ve only come up with three reasons thus far. I leave the rest to ... Read More »

Excited Spring Training Post


*Overly Dramatic Introduction* *Observation From Game Prone To Selection Bias* *Absurd Reaction To Game Observation* *Irresponsible Usage Of Data From Miniscule Sample Size* *Fallacy Ridden Conclusion* —– Notes *Former Team Great Says Something To Current Young Player* *Current Young Player Says He Is Happy* *Player Quote About Being In Great Shape* *Player Quote About Wanting To Win* Read More »

Ryan Braun’s suspension has been overturned, but the trial has just begun


While Ryan Braun’s suspension over a positive drug test has ended with it being overturned, I think everybody recognizes that his trial has only just begun. While the suspension being lifted was a boost to the Milwaukee Brewers, it probably would have actually been better for Braun’s reputation had he gotten suspended but for reasons that were shown to clearly ... Read More »

Ryan Braun: What You Don’t Know About His Case Is Important


As you already know, Ryan Braun of the Milwaukee Brewers will not be suspended by Major League Baseball after his positive drug test was overturned by arbitrator Shyam Das. Your browser does not support iframes. As such, those who relentlessly moralized about Braun from the moment his positive test results were leaked surely took a step back and apologized for ... Read More »

Dustin Richardson Does His Best Bill O’Reilly Impersonation

Things Also Heard Outside A Gangbang For $2000, Alex

If you’re going to get busted for performance enhancing drugs, you might as well make it worth your while, right? Former Red Sox reliever Dustin Richardson was suspended 50 games by Major League Baseball after testing positive for performance-enhancing substances. Richardson tested positive for an amphetamine, Letrozole and metabolite, Methandienone metabolite, Methenelone and metabolite and Trenbolone and metabolite. Richardson, a ... Read More »